Friday, September 23, 2011

Going Solo

I like to be noticed. I like to make an impact on my fellow man. Call it vanity, or pride if you like. You'd probably be right.

I drove through the local late night KFC last night. This is one of those joints where you pay at the first window and then drive through to the infamous second window to collect your meal. The cute young lady at the first stop was easy. I flashed a winning smile and made sure I sounded sincere when I asked her how she was.

(Tip: The trick to sounding sincere is to actually want to know the answer.)

It went well and she honestly believed me when I told her that she too, should endeavour to 'have a nice evening'.

Have one. A nice one.

The second stop was trickier. This girl had been working a long time and had a downhill grind until her eventual end of shift. She grabbed my drink selection. (Solo - The thirst crusher) and vanished to grab the heated muck that Kentucky assures the world is food. She returned and I put on my biggest grin.

"Thanks so much!" I explained in a heartfelt manner.

Nothing. Barely a glimmer of reaction and she turned away. I'd lost her. My last chance gone. Then she opened the fridge up, and grabbed another can of drink. She turned to me with a confused look.

"Did I already give you one of these?"

"You did indeed. And you can't give me two because then they wouldn't be Solo."

Her face split in half with a grin and I waved goodbye as I drove away. She may have been charmed. She may simply have been amused that someone could be so lame, but I left a grumpy and tired girl with a smile on her face and that can't be a bad thing.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Talking Parrot

I found a wonderful story online in a format that makes it awkward so I prefer to reprint it here with a link to the original article.

This story, recounted by Larry Krauss, comes from the famous British physicist Ernest Rutherford, who told it to a great Danish physicist, Niels Bohr.

It's about a person who goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot.
He is shown a very colorful bird and told that it speaks 10 different words and its price is $500. Then he is shown a more colorful bird, with a vocabulary of 100 words, with a price of $5,000. He then sees a scruffy beast in the corner and asks how much that bird is. He is told $100,000.


"Why?" he asks. "That bird is not very beautiful at all. How many words, then, does it speak?" None, he is told. Flabbergasted, he says to the clerk, "This bird here is beautiful, and speaks 10 words and is $500. That bird over there speaks 100 words and is $5,000. How can that scruffy little bird over there, who doesn't speak a single word, be worth $100,000?"

The clerk smiles and says, "That bird thinks."
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